译林人文精选 在线下载 pdf mobi 2025 epub 电子版

简介：

本书汇集了美国“成人教育之父”——戴尔·卡耐基最震撼人心的思想精华，是作者最成功的励志经典。自l936年问世以来，在世界各地至少已译成58种文字，全球总销量已达九千余万册，成为最持久畅销的人文励志书之一，数十年来，稳居成功励志类图书榜首。只要遵循书中这些简单实用的人际交往准则和生活技巧，你就定能获得成功。

导读：

20世纪最畅销的情商教育经典

被西方世界视为社交技巧的圣经

永远都不要奢望让世界来适应你，你对了，世界就对了

卡耐基留给我们的绝不仅仅是几本书和一所学校，其真正的价值在于，他把个人成功的技巧传授给了每一个想出人头地的年轻人。

——约翰·F.肯尼迪（美国第三十五任总统）

戴尔·卡耐基的这些原则如魔术般令人震惊，他改变了三亿人的生活。

——基思·鲁珀特·默多克（美国传媒大亨）

在人类出版史上，任何一本书都无法像卡耐基著作那样如此深入人心；也唯有卡耐基的书，在作者辞世后仍然长期占据我们的排行榜。

——《纽约时报》

本书将助你赢得以下成就：

１．　剔除心灵深处的陈规陋习，开创新思维，拓展新视野，发现新目标；

２．　迅捷而轻松地结交新朋友；

３．　提升名望，畅享盛名；

４．　赢得他人对你思路的认同；

５．　扩大个人影响，提高声望，完善处事能力；

６．　妥善处理积怨，避免争执，与他人和睦共处；

７．　成为优秀的演说者、令人愉悦的交谈者；

８．　成为同事们工作热情的激发者。

此书已被译成三十六种语言出版，为逾千万的读者铸造了以上成就。

序　言…………………………………………………………………………………………

充分利用本书的九项建议……………………………………………………………………

第一章　与人交往的基本技巧………………………………………………………………

１　“若要采撷蜂蜜，请不要莽撞蜂巢”………………………………………

２　与人和睦相处的秘诀…………………………………………………………

３　换位思考，替他人着想………………………………………………………

第二章　让你受欢迎的六种方法……………………………………………………………

１　广受欢迎的途径：做到真心理解他人………………………………………

２　保持微笑，给人留下良好的第一印象………………………………………

３　头撞南墙的起因：忘记他人的名字…………………………………………

４　倾听，成就优秀交流者………………………………………………………

５　让人兴味盎然之道：抓住对方的利益………………………………………

６　让别人对你“一见钟情”……………………………………………………

第三章　如何让他人认同你的思维…………………………………………………………

１　辩论无法决出输赢……………………………………………………………

２　树敌的祸因：“你错了”……………………………………………………

３　如果你错了，就承认吧………………………………………………………

４　一滴蜂蜜，友善的开端………………………………………………………

５　苏格拉底的秘密：获取他人的认同…………………………………………

６　处理抱怨时的安全阀：让对方诉说…………………………………………

７　争取合作………………………………………………………………………

８　创造奇迹的良方………………………………………………………………

９　给予他人同情…………………………………………………………………

１０　向对方提出人皆向往的高尚请求…………………………………………

１１　模仿影视作品，演绎你的想法……………………………………………

１２　当走投无路时，请试试激发挑战心理……………………………………

第四章　领导的艺术：技巧地改变他人……………………………………………………

１　夸赞：纠错的必由之路………………………………………………………

２　批评，但要避免招致憎恶……………………………………………………

３　首先谈及自身的过错…………………………………………………………

４　人人都不会乐意服从命令……………………………………………………

５　给他人留住颜面………………………………………………………………

６　鞭策他人迈向成功的法宝……………………………………………………

７　给你的爱犬取个好听的名字…………………………………………………

８　纠错时，为对方创造轻松的环境……………………………………………

９　让对方欣然从命………………………………………………………………

第五章　创造奇迹的信函……………………………………………………………………

第六章　创造幸福美满的家庭生活…………………………………………………………

１　唠叨：婚姻走向坟墓的致命因素……………………………………………

２　爱就是让对方自如自我地生活………………………………………………

３　一味指责，婚姻迟早会触礁…………………………………………………

４　皆大欢喜的交流方式：真心地赞美…………………………………………

５　女人很看重细节………………………………………………………………

６　恭敬：幸福的源泉……………………………………………………………

７　不做婚姻白痴…………………………………………………………………

戴尔·卡耐基，美国“成人教育之父”。20世纪早期，美国经济陷入萧条，战争和贫困导致人们失去了对美好生活的愿望，而卡耐基独辟蹊径地开创了一套融演讲、推销、为人处世、智能开发于一体的教育方式，他运用社会学和心理学知识，对人性进行了深刻的探讨和分析。他讲述的许多普通人通过奋斗获得成功的真实故事，激励了无数陷入迷茫和困境的人，帮助他们重新找到了自己的人生。

接受卡耐基教育的有社会各界人士，其中不乏军政要员，甚至包括几位美国总统。千千万万的人从卡耐基的教育中获益匪浅。

卡耐基在实践的基础上撰写而成的著作，是20世纪最畅销的成功励志经典。他的主要代表作有《人性的弱点》、《人性的优点》、《语言的突破》、《人性的弱点全集》。这些书出版后，立即风靡全世界，先后被翻译成几十种文字，被誉为“人类出版史上的奇迹”，无数读者由此走上了成功之路。

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你所认为的并非真正的你；反倒是你怎么想，你就是什么样的人。

我们应该关心自己的问题，而非担忧。

关注意味着要认清问题，并冷静地采取步骤处理它，忧虑只是慌乱地兜圈子。

伤害人的并非事件本身，而是他对事件的看法。

人如果改变对事与人的看法，事与人就对他发生改变……

只要将一个人内心的态度由恐惧转为奋斗，就能克服任何障碍。

查尔斯华特服务在纽约市一家极具声誉的银行里，他被指派调查一家公司业务情况的秘密报告。华特知道有家实业公司的经理，对这情形最清楚，可以提供他所需要的资料，华特就去拜访那位经理。正当华特被引进经理室时，一个年轻女子由门外探头进来，告诉那位经理说，她那天没什么好邮票给他。

经理向那女郎点点头后，接着向华特解释的说：「我在替我那十二岁的孩子收集邮票。」

华特坐下说明他的来意，就即提出他的问题。可是那位经理却是含糊其辞，概括笼统，不搭边际的应付了一阵，很明显的，他是不愿意说。华特用尽了办法，也无法使他多说些，这次谈话简短枯燥，得不到一点要领。

华特也是我讲习班里的一个学员，他说：「说实在的，我真不知该怎么办才好………后来，我突然想起他那个女秘书对他说的话，邮票、十二岁的小孩，同时我又想到，我们银行的国外汇兑部，常和世界各地通信，有不少平时少见的外国邮票，现在正可以派到用处。

第二天的下午，我再去拜访那位经理，同时传话进去，我有很多邮票，特地带来给他的儿子………你说，我是不是受到热烈的欢迎？那是当然的事，他紧握我的手，脸上满是喜悦的笑容。他看了看邮票，一再的说：「我的乔琪一定喜欢这一张………嗯，这一张更好，那是少有见到的。」

我们谈了半个小时的邮票，还看他儿子的相片………随后，不需要我再开口了。他费了一个小时以上的时间，提供出各项我所需要的资料。他说完自己所知道的情形后，又把公司里的职员叫来问，接着还打了几个电话问他的朋友………而且还指出那家公司财产状况的各项报告、函件，使我得到一个极大的收获。

一个不关心别人，对别人不感兴趣的人，他的生活必遭受重大的阻碍、困难，同时会替别人带来极大的损害、困扰，所有人类的失败，都是由于这些人而才发生的。

书籍介绍

简介：

本书汇集了美国“成人教育之父”——戴尔·卡耐基最震撼人心的思想精华，是作者最成功的励志经典。自l936年问世以来，在世界各地至少已译成58种文字，全球总销量已达九千余万册，成为最持久畅销的人文励志书之一，数十年来，稳居成功励志类图书榜首。只要遵循书中这些简单实用的人际交往准则和生活技巧，你就定能获得成功。

导读：

20世纪最畅销的情商教育经典

被西方世界视为社交技巧的圣经

永远都不要奢望让世界来适应你，你对了，世界就对了

卡耐基留给我们的绝不仅仅是几本书和一所学校，其真正的价值在于，他把个人成功的技巧传授给了每一个想出人头地的年轻人。

——约翰·F.肯尼迪（美国第三十五任总统）

戴尔·卡耐基的这些原则如魔术般令人震惊，他改变了三亿人的生活。

——基思·鲁珀特·默多克（美国传媒大亨）

在人类出版史上，任何一本书都无法像卡耐基著作那样如此深入人心；也唯有卡耐基的书，在作者辞世后仍然长期占据我们的排行榜。

——《纽约时报》

本书将助你赢得以下成就：

１．　剔除心灵深处的陈规陋习，开创新思维，拓展新视野，发现新目标；

２．　迅捷而轻松地结交新朋友；

３．　提升名望，畅享盛名；

４．　赢得他人对你思路的认同；

５．　扩大个人影响，提高声望，完善处事能力；

６．　妥善处理积怨，避免争执，与他人和睦共处；

７．　成为优秀的演说者、令人愉悦的交谈者；

８．　成为同事们工作热情的激发者。

此书已被译成三十六种语言出版，为逾千万的读者铸造了以上成就。

• 作者：Too 发布时间：2015-05-14 15:38:01

  在kindle上看的“中国华侨出版社”版本，盗版的电子书各种错字，而且感觉翻译有点不爽。以前一直觉得这样的畅销书没啥意思，但是翻看之下，还是引起自己很多感触。所以趁中亚出的合集版，买了这个版本的，虽然看完了，但是有空就翻看还是不错的，里面一些观点对了解一般人的想法有帮助。

• 作者：cookie.z 发布时间：2015-06-11 23:26:21

  很说教，也很有共鸣，当做提醒。想想这是十九世纪三十年代写的……

• 作者：Millie 发布时间：2014-07-05 21:17:04

  案例非常多，总体还是有用的心灵鸡汤。当你情绪低落心情不好的时候，可以从中汲取力量。

• 作者：劈头士》睁木 发布时间：2013-06-29 23:24:42

  这本书可以作为任何职业岗前培训的材料~~多数内容在工作几年后自己都会掌握，但是未必能形成文字归纳起来。卡耐基所作的就是把生活阅历编成场景，并精炼成一句格言~~倒不如抄在手边，时常看看，因为总有那么多人所共知的道理，做起事来依然脑残不已。。。有则改之无则加勉吧~~

• 作者：诗人形容 发布时间：2023-03-04 15:13:02

  确实太短了

• 作者：瓶上按红胶 发布时间：2014-01-26 21:18:30

  中文名翻译的很邪恶，其实可以改叫做好人育成手册

• [杂谈] 如何去赢得朋友影响他人

  作者：藤壺 发布时间：2013-07-25 02:00:34

  这本书，中译名非常酷炫，叫做《人性的弱点》。早先只听说过中译本，被这酷炫的名字给忽悠住了，以为是一本高深莫测的人生哲理。直到前几天，我抱着练习英语阅读的目的去找了这个英文版，然后上豆瓣看了看。原来那本酷炫的书有一个非常土鳖的英文名字 'How to Win Friends and Influence People'。不过实际证明，名字酷炫掩盖不住内容的杂乱；土鳖的Title下才是最精彩的内容。

  这本书的中英文版我都有，都看过一些。这本英文版粗略的把内容读完，因为为了练习英语阅读，所以细读目前只到35%。中文版是卡耐基的两本书'How to Win Friends and Influence People' & ‘Start Living'拼凑成的。如果只是1+1的拼法倒也无妨，但是那种1A+2B+1C+2A这种乱七八糟的拼法，我个人是觉得，有能力的人还是去读英文原版吧。

  豆瓣上这本书的书评我大致翻了一下，第一名的是喷嚏网铂程写的，他其实把精髓写出来了，只是太过文艺，我觉得基本上点’有用‘的人80%都没看懂。排第二名的是出来搞笑的，整篇内容就是把那个中译本的目录給抄了下来，然后我还看见有评论如是”太正确了，《人性的弱点全集》最经典的读书笔记就是它的目录“。请允许我对这些人的智商做一个悲伤的表情。

  大四上时，我的读书习惯从阿娇身上受益颇深。他说过，读一本书时，有一半的精力是要花在思考这几个问题上：Who is this author? What has he done? For what purpose does the author write this book? How is its reliability?

  卡耐基不是哲学家，他是个成功学家，是个成人教育专家。说白了，他在当时做的工作就和现在公司外聘请来给新员工培训的讲师差不多。我也去百度了一些他的资料，他做的那些成就，我觉得夸大了太多。在我看来，他只是在当时成人教育不够成体系的时候在这个行业做的最好，同时自己在这方面有自己的独到之处，然后把这些写成了书。'How to Win'这本书不是什么人生哲学，卡耐基写这本书的目的在前言里有很明显的表述: "I know what those adults want (the ability to deal with people). But the book they need has never been written." 同时，他也很明确的说了，这本书不是什么道理性的说教，而是教给你该怎么做。"This is an action book"

  我有一个朋友，我们一般叫他金老板。他是一个社交能力很强的人，上司、下属、同辈、长辈，他都能打点周全，赢得每一个人的认同和喜爱。后来他去了某国企的公关部，我们也觉得这是最适合他做的事情。我曾经思考过，是什么让他能如此受欢迎。原因可能有很多，看完此书后，我暂时得到的答案是，他发自内心地愿意并热衷于和所有人打交道。

  整本书道理很少，大部分都是一些case或者story。印象最深的是两个，一个是Lincoln在南北战争最胶着时写给Meade的信，一个是Roosevelt打电话给邻居让她去看bobwhite。书里都有详细的细节，这里不繁述了。这些从伟人身上摘取的细节故事，我觉得更有说服力。That's the reason those great people are great.

  书是好书，不故弄玄虚，也没有华而不实。推荐给所有人。

• 做人做事的普遍原则

  作者：Hammer_ 发布时间：2012-02-03 18:21:57

  Before we commence reading How To Win Friends And Influence People, we should first realize that this book had been written to be used to as textbook for the author's course in Effective speaking and Human relationship and it still used for today.

  So please not categorize this book as Self-help or Motivational book which often be degraded by those who unceasingly declaim how badly they hate this sort of things.

  Dealing with people is probably the biggest problem we face, especially if you are in business. Those principles can apply to all walks of people.

  If you wish to get the most out of this book, there is one indispensable requirement, one essential infinitely more important than any rule or technique. Unless you have this one fundamental requisite, a thousand rules on how to study will avail little.

  What is this magic requirement? Just this: a deep, driving desire to learn, a vigorous determination to increase your ability to deal with people.

  Once you believe,that works.

  “Education,” said the author “is the ability to meet life’s situations,”

  If by the time you have finished reading the first three chapters of this book- if you aren’t then a little better equipped to meet life’s situations, then I shall consider this book to be a total failure so far as you are concerned. For “the great aim of education,” said the author, “is not knowledge but action.”

  And this is an action book :)

  ----------------------------------

  readingnote:

  第一大章：怎样赢得朋友

  原则一：永远不要去批评别人

  很精辟，我们应该转换方式，让他们自己发现，或者用一种温和，婉转的方式，反之就算是中肯的批评也是有害无利

  1.ninety-nine times out of a hundred, people don’t criticize themselves for anything, no matter how wrong it may be.

  2.Criticism is futile because it puts a person on the defensive and usually makes him strive to justify himself. Criticism is dangerous, because it wounds a person’s precious pride, hurts his sense of importance, and arouses resentment

    

  3.Let’s realize that the person we are going to correct and condemn will probably justify himself or herself, and condemn us in return or, like the gentle Taft, will say: “I don’t see how I could have done any differently from what I have.

  4.每当我们想要批评别人的时候，想想这句话：“I don’t see how I could have done any differently from what I have”Judge not, that ye be not judged

  5.最真诚的忠告------勿责人，常思已过：Do you know someone you would like to change and regulate and improve? Good! That is fine. I am all in favor of it, But why not begin on yourself? From a purely selfish standpoint, that is a lot more profitable than trying to improve others - yes, and a lot less dangerous. “Don’t complain about the snow on your neighbor’s roof,” said Confucius, “when your own doorstep is unclean.”

  6.每个人都是感性的动物：When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity.

  7.我们应该做的：Instead of condemning people, let’s try to understand them. Let’s try to figure out why they do what they do. That’s a lot more profitable and intriguing than criticism and it breeds sympathy, tolerance and kindness. “To know all is to forgive all.”

  ------------------------------

  原则二 如何与人打交道---Give honest and sincere appreciation

  1、（有道理！）There is only one way under high heaven to get anybody to do anything. Did you ever stop to think of that? Yes, just one way. And that is by making the other person want to do it. Remember, there is no other way.

  2.每个人都得到赞扬啊：The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated.The desire for a feeling of importance is one of the chief distinguishing differences between mankind and the animals

  3. 赞扬和奉承的区别：The difference between appreciation and flattery? That is simple. One is sincere and the other insincere. One comes from the heart out,the other from the teeth out. One is unselfish,the other selfish. One is universally admired, the other universally condemned.

  4.多点发自内心的感激，别吝啬对我们爱的人的赞扬：When we are not engaged in thinking about some definite problem, we usually spend about 95 percent of our time thinking about ourselves. Now, if we stop thinking about ourselves for a while and begin to think of the other person’s good points, we won’t have to resort to flattery so cheap and false that it can be spotted almost before it is out of the mouth

  5. 真的是这样呢：Let’s cease thinking of our accomplishments, our wants. Let’s try to figure out the other person’s good points. Then forget flattery. Give honest, sincere appreciation. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise,” and people will cherish your words and treasure them and repeat them over a lifetime -repeat them years after you have forgotten them

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  原则三. 去谈论人家感兴趣的事----Arouse in the other person an eager want

  1.少谈自己，谈大家的兴趣和利益所在：So the only way cm earth to influence other people is to talk about what they want and show them how to get it. Remember that tomorrow when you are trying to get somebody to do something. If, for example, you don’t want your children to smoke, don’t preach at them, and don’t talk about what you want? but show them that cigarettes may keep them from making the basketball team or winning the hundred-yard dash.（销售的人应该学学，学会从他人的角度看问题）

  2.If out of reading this book you get just one thing- an increased tendency to think always in terms of other people’s point of view, and see things from their angle - if you get that one thing out of this book, it may easily prove to be one of the building blocks of your career.

  3、我们的目的不是为了操纵人，而是实现双赢：Looking at the other person’s point of view and arousing in him an eager want for something is not to be construed as manipulating that person so that he will do something that is only for your benefit and his detriment

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  第二大章：怎样让人喜欢你

  原则一：Become genuinely interested in other people--对他人感兴趣

  1.If we want to make friends, let’s put ourselves out to do things for other people -things that require time, energy, unselfishness and thoughtfulness

  2.If we want to make friends, let’s greet people with animation and enthusiasm. When somebody calls you on the telephone use the same psychology

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  原则二：经常微笑

  1.Actions speak louder than words, and a smile says, “I like you, You make me happy. I am glad to see you.”That is why dogs make such a hit. They are so glad to see us that they almost jump out of their skins. So, naturally, we are glad to see them. A baby’s smile has the same effect

  2.A man without a smiling face must not open a shop.”Your smile is a messenger of your good will. Your smile brightens the lives of all who see it. To someone who has seen a dozen people frown, scowl or turn their faces away, your smile is like the sun breaking through the clouds. Especially when that someone is under pressure from his bosses, his customers, his teachers or parents or children, a smile can help him realize that all is not hopeless -that there is joy in the world.

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  原则三：记住别人的名字

  Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language

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  原则四： 做一个好的听众，让别人去谈论自己（Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves）

  So if you aspire to be a good conversationalist, be an attentive listener. To be interesting, be interested. Ask questions that other persons will enjoy answering. Encourage them to talk about themselves and their accomplishments.

  Remember that the people you are talking to are a hundred times more interested in themselves and their wants and problems than they are in you and your problems. A person’s toothache means more to that person than a famine in China which kills a million people. A boil on one’s neck interests one more than forty earthquakes in Africa. Think of that the next time you start a conversation

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  原则五：谈别人感兴趣的事（Talk in terms of the other person’s interests. ）

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  原则六：承认对方的优点和对自己的重要性（Make the other person feel important-and do it sincerely）

  The unvarnished truth is that almost all the people you meet feel themselves superior to you in some way, and a sure way to their hearts is to let them realize in some subtle way that you recognize their importance, and recognize it sincerely. Remember what Emerson said: “Every man I meet is my superior in some way. In that, I learn of him.

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  第三大章：How to Win People to Your Way of Thinking

  原则一：避免和人辩论，因为你永远不会赢---这个，偶觉得还是方式的问题，不过还是尽量避免好了，因为没啥意义啊！：）The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it

  You can’t win an argument. You can’t because if you lose it, you lose it,and if you win it, you lose it. Why?Well, suppose you triumph over the other man and shoot This argument full of holes and prove that he is non compos mentis.Then what? You will feel fine. But what about him? You have made him feel inferior. You have hurt his pride. He will resent your triumph. And A man convinced against his will Is of the same opinion still

  If you argue and rankle and contradict, you may achieve a victory sometimes, but it will be an empty victory because you will never get your opponent’s good wil

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  独立一段，关于怎样应对argument的建议：

  一 不同的见解是有益的：Welcome the disagreement. Remember the slogan, “When two partners always agree, one of them is not necessary.” If there is some point you haven’t thought about, be thankful if it is brought to your attention. Perhaps this disagreement is your opportunity to be corrected before you make a serious mistake.

  二：(别相信你的第一直觉印象--适用于异见）Distrust your first instinctive impression. Our first natural reaction in a disagreeable situation is to be defensive. Be careful. Keep calm and watch out for your first reaction. It may be you at your worst, not your best

  三（控制你的脾气）Control your temper. Remember, you can measure the size of a person by what makes him or her angry. Listen first. Give your opponents a chance to talk. Let them finish. Do not resist, defend or debate. This only raises barriers. Try to build bridges of understanding. Don’t build higher barriers of misunderstanding.

  四：求同存异：Look for areas of agreement. When you have heard your opponents out, dwell first on the points and areas on which

  you agree.

  五：诚实： Be honest, Look for areas where you can admit error and say so. Apologize for your mistakes. It will help disarm your

  opponents and reduce defensiveness.

  六：Promise to think over your opponents’ ideas and study them carefully. And mean it. Your opponents may be right. It is a lot easier at this stage to agree to think about their points than to move rapidly ahead and find yourself in a position where your opponents can say: “We tried to tell you, but you wouldn’t listen.”

  七：感谢你的对手：Thank your opponents sincerely for their interest. Anyone who takes the time to disagree with you is interested in the same things you are. Think of them as people who really want to help you, and you may turn your opponents into friends.

  八：给点时间给对方（很重要，很多时候回头看，会觉得当时狠傻，没必要为这问题吵，也从另一方面得出，和人去争论什么，真的没啥意义）Postpone action to give both sides time to think through the problem

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  原则二：别告诉别人自己比他们要高明

  这段狠有哲理，别证明自己比其他人聪明，就算知道，也别告诉他

  That is a challenge. It arouses opposition and makes the listener want to battle with you before you even start. It is difficult, under even the most benign conditions, to change people’s minds. So why make it harder? Why handicap yourself? If you are going to prove anything, don’t let anybody know it. Do it so subtly, so adroitly, that no one will feel that you are doing it.

  This was expressed succinctly by Alexander Pope: Men must be taught as if you taught them not And things unknown proposed as things forgot.

  Over three hundred years ago Galileo said: You cannot teach a man anything? you can only help him to find it within himself.

  As Lord Chesterfield said to his son: Be wiser than other people if you can? but do not tell them so.

  （勇于承认错误是最对的）You will never get into trouble by admitting that you may be wrong. That will stop all argument and inspire your opponent to be just as fair and open and broad-minded as you are. It will make him want to admit that he, too, may be wrong

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  原则三：勇于认错

  When we are right, let’s try to win people gently and tactfully to our way of thinking, and when we are wrong and that will be surprisingly often, if we are honest with ourselves - let’s admit our mistakes quickly and with enthusiasm. Not only will that technique produce astonishing results? but, believe it or not, it is a lot more

  fun, under the circumstances, than trying to defend oneself.

  Remember the old proverb: "By fighting you never get enough, but by yielding you get more than you expected.”

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  原则四：以友好的方式开始 Begin in a friendly way.

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  原则五： Get the other person saying “yes, yes”

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  原则六：Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.

  （这里和上面有点重复了，其实这里有很多原则是共通的）

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  原则七：Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers

  卡内基是个中国通，他引用了好多中国古代的谚语和道德经的东西：

  " The reason why rivers and seas receive the homage of a hundred mountain streams is that they keep below them. Thus they are able to reign over all the mountain streams. So the sage, wishing to be above men, put himself below them, wishing to be before them, he put himself behind them. Thus, though his place be above men, they do not feel his weight,though his place be before them, they do not count it an injury.”

  海纳百川，有容乃大

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  如果仅仅把这书当做是快餐书，励志书，成功学，

  真的很可惜，

  这书流传这么久真有它的道理，一些自以为是的“读书人”可能不屑看这类书，替他们遗憾。

  一本值得反复看的经典之作，最重要是去实践上述的原则，

  要记住：“This is an action book.”

  2012.2.3

  By Hammer