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1. 使自己具有深切的欲望，想精通人际关系的种种原则

2. 每章至少读过两遍，再进入下一个章节。

3. 阅读的时候，时时停下来自问，该如何应用书中所提出的建议。

4. 画下重点。

5. 每个月温习一次。

6. 遇有机会马上应用这些原则。把本书当做工作指南或手册，已解决日常碰到的难题。

7. 把自我训练的过程游戏化。要别人指出你的过错，你则给他们奖品等。

8. 每周检讨行事过程，看自己犯下什么过错，什么地方可以改进，或自己学到什么教训等。

9. 在本书后面写下记录，以显示自己何时及如何应用这些原则。

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• 作者：_特等 发布时间：2021-04-16 15:33:17

  佶屈聱牙 翻译的太晦涩了 尤其是《麦迪逊广场的天方夜谭》 对比了其他版本更是如此 但说起小说本身 的确是真诚热忱的创作啊 读到全书后四分之一的故事时候 基本能猜到了翻转的内容 但《哈格雷夫斯的骗局》仍然很暖心

• 作者：悟空不成佛 发布时间：2021-12-20 17:26:31

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• 作者：小仙女 发布时间：2015-07-16 19:52:22

  不知道为什么三番没有九曲花街，可能它们觉得没有很特别。还有优胜美地为神马要翻译成约塞米蒂国家公园，是通译么？信息质量总体还可以。

• “幸与不幸”都是个人的选择，我们能做的只是向前

  作者：swl.lulu 发布时间：2022-11-06 01:17:51

  俄国作家陀思妥耶夫斯基说："人之所以不幸，是因为他不知道自己是幸福的，仅此而已。" 其实，每个人都是幸福的，只不过人们总将自己的幸福当成了理所当然，却对别人的幸福羡慕不已。生活确实不能让人处处满意，但也实在没必要，因为一个不满意，就否定了自己的整个人生。人性总是把太多的热情消耗在失去和未得到上面，却没有把足够的关注放在自己的拥有上。而只有当你的内在，能够感受自己的拥有越多，才能越感受到幸福之所在。毕竟，人生很长，而那些真正不幸的人只是那些确信自己不幸或不值得幸福的人。

  在心理学家阿德勒认为，决定我们自身的不是过去的经历，而是我们自己赋予经历的意义。也就是说，如果你感觉自己不幸，是你赋予了经历消极悲观的意义。但如果你愿意赋予“不幸”不一样的意义呢，可能就会收获到不一样的人生。

• 摘录

  作者：喵巫 发布时间：2009-02-04 05:19:11

  Cities had always been places where to some extent the individual's origins could be hidden and in which personal qualities, rather than rank or wealth, were what counted...

  [...]huge industrial infernos where truly the stranger could [...] find a new identity in the anonymity of the surging crowds.

  The spatial structure of these great new cities intensified the individual's experience of mobility, both geographically and socially...

  Nietzsche spoke [...] of the fragmentation of identity caused by the 'tropical tempo' of modernity...

  [C]ostumes [...] no longer reflected a clear rank or status, but rather a socially defined time or day, or occasion, or an individual state of feeling.

  This is a world in which the necessities and rhythms of nature have been abolished: yet at the same time the man-made landscape comes to resemble a freak of nature, and to have a life of its own that takes it outside the control of human agency.

  [H]e can never leave, but only lose himself within its surging, turbulent eddies, ebbs, and flows.

  Before the development of buses, railroads, and trams in the nineteenth century, people had never bee in a position of having to look at one another for long minutes or even hours without speaking to one another.

  There was therefore an eroticism special to the nineteenth-century crowd...

  Frotteurism, exhibitionism, voyeurism are sexual aberrations that rejoice in the stealth and irresponsibility of the crowd.

  [T]he constant friction of self with a barrage of sensation and with other personalities generated [...] a more intense awareness of one's own subjectivity than the old uniform and unwavering rhythm of rural and provincial life. In the city the individual constantly interacts with others who are strangers, and survives by the manipulation of self.

  Life in the nineteenth century was more sharply than before divided between working hours, repaid in wages, and 'leisure' during which wages could be spent.

  Production bred consumption...

  [T]he capicalist city invented a fantasy world that was neither wholly a public nor quite a private realm: the department store.

  There was a revolution in shopping.

  The haggling and bargaining that was still widespread in France in the earlier half of the nineteenth century had not persisted to the same extent in England, but to enter a shop still implied a commitment to buy, stockes were limited, and of course there was nothing ready made. Yet already, shopping was a social event.

  In the 1830s and 1840s stores selly 'dry goods' (haberdashery, cloth, cloaks and trimmings) began to appear both in European capitals and in the eastern seaboard cities of North America. The Bon Marché, which has usually claimed the title of the first department store, opened as a small left-bank piece goods shop in 1852...

  Adornment ... which gathers the personality's ... radiance as if in a focal point, allows the mere having of the person to become a visible quality of its being.

  --Georg Simmel